Tuesday, March 25, 2008

#15 Kumon Math



This is a special edition of Things Asian People Like. While our other blogs are things ALL Asians like, only Asian Moms like Kumon Math. First off, let me set the foundation. Math is religion for Asians. Multiplication tables are our version of J.C., the tables came down to Earth from the heavens to forgive Asian mortals for their mathematical sins. The Multiplication Gospel showed us the light and saved us from any future sins. Math is our religion and KUMON is our Church.

I HATE CHURCH and I HATE KUMON MATH! It's a method invented by Toru Kumon, a Japanese Brotha. I remember when I was 5 years old, my mom asked me, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" I said, I want to be Charles Barkley. To me, Chuck was a freak of nature. He was fat as shit, still super athletic, got tons of nookie from white chicks, and had funny nicknames for everyone. My goal was to be Charles Barkley. Like any good mom, my mother did everything she could not to see it happen. As soon as I said I wanted to be a 6'5" 260lb Hai Ren who went to strip clubs for the legs and eggs shift, she marched my yellow ass straight down to the nearest Kumon Math Center.

While other kids were out playing ball, collecting bugs, and enjoying life, I was doing packets of timed math problems under halogen lights with other four-eyed zombie looking Asian kids. I mean, mom, seriously, was there not a Rex Kwon Dojo in the neighborhood I could have gone to instead? I'm sure our ancestors would have been equally proud if I could break a piece of wood with my face. But alas, mom never listened. She believed in the power of Kumon Math.



This is a photo of a Kumon class. Notice the inordinate amount of Asian people. While all these politicians and hipsters point to China, India, and other South East Asian Textile Sweatshops, they turn a blind eye to the sweatshops right here in AMERICA! What, do the Beastie Boys need to go on a Free Kumon Students Tour for you people to pay attention?



Here, we have a sheet from a Kumon Math Packet. usually, there are 20 to 25 pages of these front and back. You have 2 minutes to finish the packet and if you don't finish or you miss too many problems, they send in the Japanese John McCain to hit you over the head with an abacus, dunk you upside down in a toilet and make you eat American food like Mayonnaise Sandwiches. Chinese McCain hurt, McCain hurt weal bad.

18 comments:

Mgccl said...

Nice nice...
but I like math xDDD

Anonymous said...

So do you still want to be like Charles B? Its sad nobody wants to go to school nowadays, it seems being on the American Idol is the new goal. I'm sure it was a sacrifice for you mom as well, to pay and take you to Kumon. I hope you're grateful that she loved you enough to take you. Watch the news and you'll see how many kids are neglected, yet those of us who are fortunate choose to complain. Half glass full...

Anonymous said...

So, did your education teach you that the saying is actually "glass half full"?

Dreams are dreams mate. I wanted to be a race team engineer, but ended up doing law. I think my dream failed...

Julian said...

viagra online

buy viagra

generic viagra

Anonymous said...

I do kumon. I have time to do other things and it gives me an edge ahead of other kids in math

Anonymous said...

Hahahaha so true! So true it hurts!

Anonymous said...

Im asian. I HATE IT!!!!
My parents won't let me quit no matter what.
Then the worksheets......Starting at 8:30 ending at 10:00-11:45!
when i really couldn't do some hard work (a few grades above where i am) they just told my mom that i was being lazy! So now every time i can't do a packet really thats what my parents tell me!

Anonymous said...

I have been a franchisee of Kumon for many years and have seen the management madness since 1992. Today I was informed that the entire senior Japanese management at Kumon North was terminated by the parent company in Japan. Akira Hamanaka (President), Atsuhi (Kuma) Nose (EVP), Taka Yamaouchi (VP), Masaki Katsumata (COO) were removed in a unforseen swoop by Kumon Institute of Education because of serious irregularities during their previous tenure at Kumon Asia & Oceania where Akira Hamanaka was President previously. KIE has sent a team of auditors and forensic investigators to KNA to investigate irregularities by the Japanese expat management. There are rumors from staff that a major financial scandal is seen regarding contracts being awarded to vendors in the United States during their term. The entire company has been seen as being mismanaged since the arrival of Akira Hamanaka in 2011. He is also seen by franchisees as bringing over buddies from Kumon Asia Oceania. Atsushi Nose (EVP) was seen as incompetent with constant absentee management. Others have seen him as the brain behind all that went wrong at Kumon North America, with Akira Hamanaka as a mere "figurehead." Growth has spiraled down to very low single digits from an all time high under the previous management leaving disenchanted franchisees and higher than usual employee turnover in 2013.

Anonymous said...

I was a student of Kumon of Howell, NJ. The teacher Connie Schmidt was mean and crazy. She did not care about me or other students. I hated going to her center and only went because my parents wanted me to. Finally they realized that Connie Schmidt had psychological issues and got me out. I am a happy camper now.

David said...

Kumon is not what it seems in my opinion and having had my own children in Kumon a while back. Behind the pretty picture that advertising portrays is a dirty history of child abuse, molestations and sex crimes against children at Kumon franchise learning centers. The Kumon franchisees are not certified teachers and no one knows their backgrounds amidst the tall claims. If one does a little research the conclusion will raise the hair off your skin.

http://bit.ly/1eBWzEx

David said...

Kumon Franchise

Anonymous said...

The problem with Kumon Math & Reading is that sex scandals have been perpetrated by the Kumon family themselves. So who can blame many of the franchisees for sex crimes?

http://archives.starbulletin.com/2004/09/17/news/story2.html

When my sister first opened a Kumon center in Atlanta the son of the founder of the Kumon Math & Reading company was involved in a major sex scandal with a franchisee Debra Tajiri, who owned two Kumon Math & Reading centers in Manoa and Kailua. She later claimed that Hiroshi Kumon had ruined her life after they had an affair and began asking him for money over a 21-month period beginning in March 2002. An employee of Debra Tajiri, the Kumon franchisee, later allegedly extorted $150,000 from a son of the founder of the Kumon learning method in exchange for 2,000 “compromising” photos. Debra Tajiri and one Sean Yonehiro, whom she hired to work in her centers as an assistant, were later arrested and faced a charge of sending international extortion communications which is punishable by up to 20 years in prison. Both were arrested after Yonehiro met with an FBI agent posing as Kumon’s attorney at Ala Moana Park and took from him a bag containing what he believed to be $150,000. At the time of the affair, Hiroshi Kumon was Director of Kumon Institute of Education in Japan, the parent company of Kumon North America, one of five regional headquarters worldwide responsible for operations in Canada, the United States and Mexico.

An individual who went by the name “Max Lee” and who had been e-mailing Hiroshi Kumon while he was in Japan threatening to release compromising photos of Hiroshi Kumon if he didn’t pay for them. The complaint does not describe the photos but does say that Lee threatened to release the photos if Kumon also did not send more pornographic pictures of himself. More than five years after their affair, Debra Tajiri (the Kumon franchisee) allegedly began e-mailing Hiroshi Kumon asking for $500,000 to remodel her house, the complaint said. In those e-mails, she allegedly told Kumon that “you have taken a lifestyle from me,” and that she was considering filing a lawsuit. She also accused him of infecting her with a venereal disease and said that he should pay for her medical treatment. Kumon allegedly paid her more than $350,000. Later Debra Tajiri, the Kumon franchisee, allegedly continued asking Kumon for money, saying electricity at her home was shut off and that she could not pay contractors to finish work on her home. Debra Tajiri, the Kumon franchisee, e-mailed Hiroshi Kumon again, saying she needed $550,000 to secure a building contract. When he didn’t respond, she e-mailed him saying her life was “hell” and was over, and asking him why he had not sent money. Investigators learned that the e-mails sent by “Max Lee” came from an account belonging to Debra Tajiri and from her Nipo Street home.

One of three vehicles spotted at Kumon franchisee Debra Tajiri’s residence was a white Ford pickup truck that was later seen at the Hawaii State Library — the first meeting Lee allegedly requested for Kumon’s representative to bring the money. A man was seen walking around the library on that day before leaving in the white truck registered to Yonehiro, who lists a Nipo Street address as his residence.

u2bono said...

What has Kumon to do with Viagra or buy generic Viagra online. Is Kumon selling Viagra?

IB MATHS TUTOR said...

IB World Academy has been helping students excel in IB Math(HL,SL,Studies tutor in Gurgaon , IB Physics(HL,SL)tutor in Gurgaon , IB Chemistry(HL,SL) tutor in Gurgaon , IB Economics(HL,SL) tutor in Gurgaon and Business Management(HL,SL) by providing the right skills for success.

KidbuxBlog said...

Thanks sharing, Kumon’s learning method takes students through a structured programme involving specially developed worksheets. Kumon constantly evaluates and revises the worksheets of all its programmes to ensure there is nothing hindering smooth progress. More info at:
http://kidbuxblog.com/kumon-help-unearth-kids-potential/

Anonymous said...

I'm asian and I do kumon but I hateeeee it. THey give me the same worksheets over and over again. The worksheets they give me are the ones I get wrong often but you don't learn anything by doing the same worksheet over and over again. My parents are letting me quit in October. I am actually doing kumon right now, it kind of helps me a little but I could just go on a math tutoring website instead of wasting my parent's money on worksheets I don't even do.

Blogger said...

I have just installed iStripper, so I can watch the sexiest virtual strippers on my desktop.

Anonymous said...

EAST LONGMEADOW, MA (WGGB/WSHM) - There is shocking news coming out against the Kumon Franchise owner of a Kumon Math & Reading tutoring center who is now facing charges of sexual assault and rape.

Kumon franchise owner Jimmy Chang, 32, of East Longmeadow was arrested in Manchester, CT. He is facing 12 counts of second degree sexual assault of minors.

Back in March, the 17-year-old victim went to the Manchester, CT police department and said Chang allegedly manipulated her into a long-term sexual relationship.

The victim reportedly told police that from 2012 to 2014, Chang would pick her up from her school or home to perform sexual favors.

The teenager also said that at times, Chang would have her meet him at his Kumon learning center - Kumon Math and Reading Center in Longmeadow - where he would provide alcohol to her prior to sex.

Besides being a Kumon instructor, Chang is also a youth pastor at a church in Agawam, which he and the victim both attended.

The girl said Kumon franchisee Chang would allegedly ask her to dress like a "school girl" and meet him at that church where other sexual encounters would occur.

According to court documents, the victim told Chang that she "wanted to wait - to save my virginity [..] as a Christian you are supposed to save your virginity. He responded 'do you really want to?'"

During his arrest, Chang reportedly told police, "I realized I messed up." As a Kumon instructor he admitted to have taken advantage of his role at the Kumon Math & Reading center a.k.a Kumon learning center, and committed sexual crimes against the Kumon student.

Chang appeared in court in Connecticut Tuesday where he was bonded out of jail.

The victim's identity is not being released.

For more details see: http://www.westernmassnews.com/story/29718919/east-longmeadow-man-arrested-on-sexual-assault-charges-in-ct